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Friday, October 10, 2008

Dear Pepsi


Dear Important Pepsi Executives,


I am an addict. I admit it. Although I am not alone, I will admit my addiction. You see, it started very innocently. A Pepsi here, a Pepsi there. Then it become OMGGOTTOHAVEITEVERYFUCKINGDAY.....addiction. What do you guys put in that shit? Crack? I mean, I really considered taking a sample to the local college for some testing of the contents. A blind study, but who am I to take away someone else's crack? I have kids at home and I am too old to be kicking someones ass because they are mad I took their Pepsi away...


Oh Pepsi, how I love you. Your frothy goodness rolling down my throat..... The carbonation fizz buzz I get everytime I crack you open....mmmm..... The taste of your scientifically designed recipe.....The coldness from a can kept at precisely 32 degrees makes me.....To be honest here, it just makes me want to keep on cracking those legal crack cans open.


In an effort to break my addiction, and lose some weight, I have opted for your diet version. Diet Pepsi Max to more specific. Here I was thinking Pepsi was crack! Now I found the real crack. Regular Pepsi is just a front for the good stuff. No matter how bad my morning is going, how sluggish I feel, or how little sleep I got the night before, all I have to do is stop at my local Shore Stop, pick up a bottle of ice cold Diet Pepsi Max, and within 25 minutes, it transforms me into happy, energetic, non-stop Chatty Kathy with the concentration skills of a mad mathematician. I have lost some weight around the middle since I cut the Reg. Pepsi out. I figured I used to drink ATLEAST 8 cans a day. That's 150 calories per serving or 1,200 calories per day, JUST IN SODA. But now I can have all the Diet Pepsi Max I want. I love it and I love you Important Pepsi Executives!


Sincerely,


Average Girl


(This blog is dedicated to Brittany over at Barefootfoodie. Go visit her, you will not be disappointed!)

8 comments:

Laura said...

I've heard excellent things about the max... while I hate to get a soda war started here, I'm more of a coke gal myself... maybe I should just add crack to the coke

Average Girl In Average World said...

@laura - lol.....no wars, just love!

Brian Shields said...

It's the caffeine. Since the energy drink fad started all the cola companies have slowly raised their caffeine content in order to compete. Your Diet Pepsi Max has about 70 some odd milligrams of the stuff per 20oz bottle as opposed to regular Pepsi that has roughly 40 some odd milligrams.

It's on the back of the bottle now below the nutrition label.

I, personally, have a caffeine sensitivity since I went cold turkey on the stuff over a year and a half ago to troubleshoot my sleep disorder. Since then if I drink ONE Pepsi.. I'm wired for about 12 hours, and I feel hungover the next day. So I just swear the stuff off completely. If I can find it, I'll take a caffeine free Pepsi every now and again.

It tastes different, though. Not as much bite too it.

Momisodes said...

Good GAWD I want a Pepsi now!

Thanks.

I better make it a Max, too. My muffin tops overfloweth.

Average Girl In Average World said...

@brian - I know the caffiene levels, I just turn a blind eye. Besides, my tolerence level is so high I could down a Max, and go to sleep. Once I lay down, I'm done regarldess!!! Thanks for stopping in!

Average Girl In Average World said...

@momisodes - my muffintop is still there, just not as bad....but i want a Pepsi too....DAMN!!!

Stacie said...

lol.

Two Date Diva said...

I never had diet Pepsi max, I'll have to try it. However, I have a similar relationship with Guirardelli (sp?) chocolate that you have with Pepsi. Perhaps I shold write them a nice letter......